There is nothing in the world I fear and hate more than the feeling of falling. Although many of my friends, my sister included, have assured me that skydiving does not provoke that sensation of all your organs coming up to your throat, I refuse to believe them. You submit your body to gravity's force and you don't feel that you're falling? Please! That said, I still have no idea how I let my husband's colleague talk me into doing hang gliding in Rio de Janeiro. Was I slow in connecting that this too would produce that queasy feeling I so despise?The funny thing is I was the only one in the group that knew exactly how this was going to go down. The people into whose hands you decide to entrust your life take you to the top of the mountain where they strap you, give you instructions and repeat a million times that you have to run on that ramp at top speed. They make sure you run off that cliff, not jump, but really, what difference does it make? Either way you are told to surrender your common sense and hope that, at the end, you will still be standing in one piece.
To add insult to injury, right before our turn, someone landed in a tree. The wind had suddenly picked up and things didn't go as planned. As a result, we were stalled for some time as a precaution. They assured us the person was fine, but we looked at each other unconvinced and even more petrified. I kept telling myself that there was still time to bail out. Our instructors must have known that beforehand because they did not ask for any money upfront. Something in me though was up for the challenge and so I ran, not jumped and immediately experienced the awful sensation, a bodily reaction to the obvious - you're falling, you know?
Fortunately, the feeling lasted only a second and then the gliding began. The wind was still strong and there were moments of sweaty hands, closed eyes and quiet prayers. Exactly at a moment like that, the guy to whom I was strapped decided to answer his phone. He was navigating with one hand! My eyes were suddenly open wide open scanning the area below us; what if we fall here or there? How much will it hurt? What are my chances of surviving? Oh god, the feeling of falling!
When he finally manage to maneuver us down onto the beach, I wanted to slap him in the face. I considered it, but then just thanked him and walked away. After all, I was still in one piece and we were safely on the ground. The one benefit from this experience is that I can disprove the theory of combatting your fears if you confront them. I'm still scared of falling and the hang gliding only strengthened that fear.
